September 23, 2008
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Not trying to alienate anyone, but please...
I am shocked and disappointed that some Christian women choose to judge other Christian women who work outside the home. They equate them with living outside the will of God; they equate them as sinners. And, they attempt to use Titus 2:3-5 to support their judgement that women who are not *solely* homemakers are blasphemers!
There is a problem here--a HUGE flaw. These women are ignoring the beginning of Titus 2--here is the entire passage:
Christian Behavior*1 As for yourself, you must say what is consistent with sound doctrine, namely, 2 that older men should be temperate, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, love, and endurance. 3 Similarly, older women should be reverent in their behavior, not slanderers, not addicted to drink, teaching what is good, 4 so that they may train younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled, chaste, good homemakers, under the control of their husbands, so that the word of God may not be discredited. [i.e. blasphemed]
Okay, first note that Paul is speaking to Titus about the character of the assistants he is to choose in view of the pastoral difficulties peculiar to Crete (1, 5-16). It suggests the special individual and social virtues that the various age groups and classes in the Christian community should be encouraged to acquire (2, 1-10). (source NAB)
The last part of verse 5, "...so that the word of God may not be discredited" (or blasphemed) is supporting the first verse: "...you must say what is consistent with sound doctrine..."
In other words: Older men and women, while teaching the Christian life: you must say* what is consistent with sound doctrine so that the word of God may not be blasphemed.
*Remember that blaspheme means speaking--
1. to speak impiously or irreverently of (God or sacred things).
–verb (used without object)2. to speak evil of; slander; abuse. 3. to speak irreverently of God or sacred things; utter impieties. In between the first and fifth verse, Paul lists character traits the older men and women should possess and lists examples of what older women should teach the younger women. He is not saying that women who are not "good homemakers" (which is twisted into women who work outside the home) are blasphemous.
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One more point I would like to make:
Jesus said, "Rather, blessed are those who hear the word of God and observe it." Luke 11:28
Most of you know that I was a single mom for seven years and that I worked outside the home. If I had kept a tally, I could tell you of all of the blessings and miracles God bestowed upon me during that time! God blessed my son and me over and over again. One of our most notable blessings was when God brought my husband, David, into our lives.
And, I worked with other Christian women, and had friends who were working Christian women, of whom I observed innumerous blessings in their lives from God. Even now, I have friends and family who work outside of the home, who tell me of the ways that God blesses them.
If working women are living outside the will of God, would they be blessed?
Comments (11)
I run into that kind of attitude even in this conservative community. Many people who are not very familar with Amish assumes that we are.... we aren't. I find it nothing wrong with with mama working away from home, providing that it is not of selfsih reasons. I was single until almost age 33. I had to work because I have no choice. I am now married with two precious little girls. Even with kids, I wouldn't mind PART-TIME job even if I don't really need to work out. I get the impression that some ladies do not think well of me taking classes even if my own dear husband strongly encouraged me to TAKE classes! I'm now to the point of making sure I don't need to depend on sisters on babysitting my children... time my classes to when my husband can babysit instead. He even will forego a few of his volunteer firefighter meetings just so I could go to a few of my own. My dearest even strongly support me making noodles and angel food cake to sell at farmer market. I don't need to as he earns almost 6 figure income and we maintain strong budgeting system. But the challenge of small side job... I love it. I have yet to figure out how to work around our two cats and a dog when it comes to making noodles.
I am saddened by the silly divisions caused by this thought. God has a different plan for different people, and for different seasons of their lives, as well. Some women should stay at home, and some women shouldn't or can't... Financial necessities are a big reason for working. I haven't worked full time since my kids were born, but I have done plenty of part time jobs (mainly childcare, it just worked out better for my family's schedule), so I could help out the family finances. I feel like you would know in your heart if God was pleased or displeased about working...as a Christian, His spirit would make it known to you somehow. When he blesses a person, it would seem like they are within His will.
I just thought I'd add that I get the critical eye in both directions. Some of my family members (aunt, cousins...) are upset that I "threw away" my college education and don't work making good money. And then the frowns from some good intentioned people from church or homeschooling moms if I have thoughts of working to help our family with our debts.
Obviously I don't think it's wrong since I work outside the home . . . lol I do have to say that I think it's silly to try to pin down what makes a good "homemaker". I mean, honestly. Every home is different, and every homemaker is different. I can't even imagine someone using those verses to say that. I have to admit I'd be seriously upset if someone said it to me.
What about the proverbs 31 wife? She did things outside her home, and it made her husband look BETTER.
You already know how I feel so I'll leave it at Well Said!
The virtuous woman in Proverbs 31 worked outside of the home!
When the judgmental want to walk through the hell that you and I have known, Katherine, in an abusive marriage...and when they have SURVIVED and had the strength to BE EMPLOYED as a SINGLE mom at the same time, then they are allowed to talk!
It didn't sink in until I read the comments... about Proverbs 31 "working" outside home. Hahaha, how many husbands would fully trust their wives to make large purchases such as car, land, and/or house? If I think it is best for the family, I would just do that but after consulting with my husband first. I go shopping without any guidance from my husband beside where to cut back in which budget categories. Each family is unique. There are so many sides to this and it happen that a lot of people chose to focus on very few sides instead of stepping back to view big picture. Yes, we as a Christian, we need to be careful not to fall into the trap of thinking that we are doing it for family's sake while it is actually more selfish reasons. Pray about it and be prepared to follow through with what God told you (that small still voice). None of this... pray for discernments and then refuses to listen because you are not excited about going that certain route. Sometimes you need to try certain route before realizing what you are supposed to be doing in first place.
@mjh905 - It's wonderful that you and your husband support each other with meetings, classes, and the farmer's market! I think that is healthy "give-and-take" in a marriage. Apparently working *from* the home is okay with these ladies--but, I have noticed that some of them end up spending quite a bit of time away from home (specifically, authors of books--for interviews, etc.).
@quilt_cats - Yes! It is divisive! One of the points I tried to make to these ladies is that God knows each of us individually, intimately--he knows every hair on our heads (Every hair on your head is numbered~Mat 10:30). God has an individual plan for each of us.
@bethro78 - Proverbs 31 is another scripture that has been twisted--they interpret it as the woman working *from* the home, not *outside* the home.
@rebekahsfair - Rebekah, I have thought the same thing. I can only think that most of these women have never *had* to work outside the home and have never encountered true evil.
@mjh905 - Yes, each family is unique! Especially on this issue, who is to say which families are living within God's will and which families are not?!
Someone threw that out there? I'd love to work outside the home - I miss grown-up interaction. Heck, I felt like I had a purpose when I worked outside the home. Now days I sometimes just wonder what I'm doing!! I do work from the home and am glad that I have the option! But yah!!
When I read this post (link following), I thought of this post of yours... http://rocksinmydryer.typepad.com/shannon/2008/09/what-id-like--3.html
@Janel64 - huh? you can read my mind across cyberfield? Adult itneraction, feeling of having a purpose when holding a job, feeling clueless when home all the time...